For me, one of the most satisfying elements of aging is starting to make peace with past versions of myself. The longer we live, the more we step and misstep, and ultimately morph into new iterations of ourselves. We start to see clearly how necessary it is to examine old ideas, shed old beliefs, and eliminate old thinking that doesn’t serve us anymore. We begin to understand the danger of complacency, stagnancy, and feverishly crave change.
In this fourth decade of my life, I have evolved in ways I never thought possible. I spoke out against pay disparity and left my high-profile TV job after 12 years. I started my own business. I grew my production company and launched two podcasts. I parented two teenage boys during a pandemic as our family navigated life in a new way. I closed the door on a toxic relationship. I opened my heart to a healthy, loving, and respectful one. I stopped shrinking and started living—on my own terms.
The metamorphosis took some courage, yes, but mostly it required sitting with discomfort. It involved swimming around in uncertainty, allowing room for the unknown, but mostly, believing in myself. Do I love myself enough to reject what conflicts with what I know to be true? Do I trust that the universe will have my back? Can I honestly see a vastly more expansive existence in my future? Will I dare step into a new, different, better “me”?
I’ve noticed some recurring feelings as part of my reinvention. The same pangs have continued to visit my spirit over and over again. I would hear voices in my being that told me I wasn’t thinking big enough or I wasn’t contributing with my highest abilities. I would also feel a certain kind of tension inside that forced me to tune in and listen. I would think, “Hmmm, this doesn’t feel like joy. Where am I supposed to go?”
“The metamorphosis took some courage, yes, but mostly it required sitting with discomfort.”
When people ask me about reinventing myself and having the will to change, I often think of Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz. “You’ve always had the power, my dear.” So often in life we walk around in these velvet handcuffs, getting in our own way of what is possible. Holding ourselves back with limiting beliefs.
Who isn’t guilty of occasionally being a slave to the negative stories we tell ourselves? Maybe you can relate. Well, I invite you to put that voice in its place. Refuse to listen. Silence it.
Show it who’s boss. When that uncertainty or pain arises, welcome it in. When that fear or self-doubt visits, don’t numb it, or dismiss it, or cover it with short-term, surface-level fixes. Feel your feelings.
As one of my good friends once encouraged me: “Get out your best china and sit down at the table with it.” Let it move through you. Let it pass. Only then can you make room for all of those loving, powerful, nurturing parts of you that were there when you were born. Those are the limitless parts of you that help you live out your highest, most impressive potential.
It should also go without saying, but I’ll say it anyway: Move your body. As important as our mental health is, our physical health will always be a critical piece of the puzzle too. Whether you walk, or run, or practice yoga, or move along with Tracy and her team, movement is healing. Movement opens up the possibilities in our lives. We position ourselves as stronger and undoubtedly set ourselves up to receive more of what is meant for us.
“Be honest with yourself and if it’s time to become the new you, lean in.”
As you settle into this new version of yourself, you will inevitably experience life differently. For me, I have a new sense of calm. I have a renewed sense of confidence. I trust my instincts more than ever before. All of this, a result of self-love from stepping into my own power.
You see, I believe that life is about answering the call.
When it’s time to change, you’ll know it—but will you pay attention? Be honest with yourself and if it’s time to become the new you, lean in. Lean way in. That’s where the magic is. The rewards are there when we stretch and expand and try on something new.